new here, my story

[imadesphousewife]

Hi, all. I've been lurking awhile and haven't had the guts to post until now. My story is long, I'll try to give the Reader's Digest version!

I'm almost 38 - and I guess I started noticing my hair loss around the time I got married. (Our 10 year anniversary is next month.) Up until then, while I'd always had fine hair, I had a ton of it. My dad has been bald for years but my mom, nearly sixty, has goregous thick hair still. (Talk about messed up genetics, huh?)

Anyways, I've tried everything just about, to no avail. I've been to countless doctors and dermatologists. I've been told everything from "women only genetically lose their hair if their mom's have hair loss" (from an RN) to "well, welfare won't pay for hair loss treatment, it's cosmetic (I'm on Medicaid, and this was from a very highly regarded dermatologist.)

I really noticed it escalating after the birth of my kids, in 2002 and 2005. I have been through some really rough times the last ten years. In January of 2006, my brother committed suicide. Six weeks later, my daughter was diagnosed with autism. This was all in ADDITION to battling hair loss. To say that I've suffered from depression and anxiety is a gross understatement.

Fast forward to today - I'm currently using 2% minoxodil - the 5% worked pretty well but my scalp couldn't take it. I've had MAJOR fallout the last 9 months after quitting it. My current dermatologist has had me on Propecia since last summer. I think it's helped slow down the shedding a bit, but not much. I have lost hope that it will ever get better, really. I avoid mirrors at all costs, the only "safe" mirror I look in is my rearview mirror. I'll pull back my hair, lean forward, and examine it up close. From that vantage point, it doesn't look as bad.

To make matters worse, my daughter, who I mentioned above, is now 8. She is an absolutely beautiful girl. I mean, really stunning. (Not just saying that cause I'm her mom, lol!) She is non-verbal, and has JUST begun using the potty. She has NO CLUE how goregous she is, and she has amazing hair. Dark, long, and thick. I have to deal with it every day, all the while thinking, she doesn't even CARE about all this great hair...she could go bald tomorrow and it wouldn't even phase her. How freakin HORRIBLE is that? Talk about warped thoughts, huh?

Anyhow, that's the condensed version. Hopefully I'll make some friends here, and find good advice. I'm looking forward to getting to know you all. I can't talk about this in "real" life with anyone. It's the one subject I can't discuss with my husband - (who, is amazing by the way. I always tell myself I must not look THAT bad, if he still finds me sexy! Sorry, tmi!) Or, for that matter, anyone else. I've lost ALL sympathy for women who have great hair and a normal daughter. Hair loss, autism. Hair loss, autism. Hair loss, autism. You think YOU have problems? What the hell ever!

Ok, that's it for now. I'm rambling

Angie:cool:

[Hope49]

Angie, pain is pain, and you've had boatload of it, haven't you? Some people just seem able to sail through this stuff and be grateful they're alive, and I know I'm not one! I'm so glad you are here, posting. I hope you get some good support here, and I hope you continue to have the strength to deal with what you have. As beautiful as your daughter is, I bet just looking at her brightens your day. And every bit of progress she makes can be directly attributable to you and your support system for her. I think the tragedy of these kids is in that you can always see/feel the intelligent child locked inside, and we just don't find that key.



My problem is much less severe, tho not less depressing to me. I'll post mine somewhere soon.

Still, it's not a matter of who has the worst hair loss, is it? It's the support we can give each other, and the options we can find here. My husband has absolutely no CLUE. He just says, if you lose too much, we'll get you some cute wigs. He also says "Your hair doesn't define you", but I've always had a weight problem, and my natural golden blond hair DID define me, the happy go lucky me. It's so easy for him - I've always been the girl who never wears makeup, throws on jeans I threw on the floor last night, and we're off to do something fun. Now I'm a HIGH MAINTENANCE person. Trying desperately to keep what I have. And then I remember that he's had diabetes for over 15 years, and also has a weight problem, and I'm ashamed.

Suffering over hair loss - - we feel ashamed to, because so many people have more severe problems. But like being overweight, hair is always out there for everyone to see...we wear our problems 24/7.

I hope things get better for you. What kind of regimen do you follow, only the propecia and minox? How long does it take before people's scalps start reacting to this stuff? And do you think if you had never used any products, you would have never had the shedding? I'm new at this and so very confused.