Having a hard day...hard last few days...

[justbeth]

Im just in a downward funk the last few days. My feelings on my hair loss are so up and down. Right now, its down, really down. The last few showers I have noticed more and more hair coming out. The front and top part of my scalp are thinning like crazy. Its all I see when I look in the mirror. I just feel sick to my stomach. My blood results came back and I had my doc send me a copy. Everything is freakin normal. Figures. Im still taking biotin and fish oil. Doesnt seem to be doing anything. I only take 1000mcg of biotin a day, usually with lunch. Should I up the dose?

I just dont know what to do. I sometimes feel like I would be happier if it just happened all at once and all fell out so I could just deal with it and get a wig. This is just torture to see it slowly happening. I have been looking at wigs lately, and want to get one just to see how it feels and what I think about it. But im scared. Dont ask me why, b/c I dont know why Im scared, but I am.

My bf tries to give me support, telling me not to worry, that we will figure out whats causing it and fix it. But he has no clue how hard that process will be. And most likely, I wont be able to fix it. It will just have to be an ongoing battle to save what I have.

Stuck here at work with no hope. I just want to cry and hide under the covers. I want to be strong with this, but I dont know that I have the strength.

I have heard of some girls getting on prenatel vitamins. Does that really work?

:(:>

[VictoriaG]

Hi Beth, I can completely sympathize with how you feel. I'm been feeling pretty much the same way. My bloodwork is good. My shedding is enough to upset me and make it very hard to do anything with my hair, but it's a relatively slow, painful (sometimes literally) process. Not thin enough to consider shaving, though, or wearing a wig.

I take 5000 mcg of biotin. I personally don't think it helps hair regrowth (at least it's not helping mine) , but supposedly the hair you have is just healthier. I also take fish oil and a B-complex. I don't know if the prenatal vitamins really help, but I haven't heard anything negative.

I send you a hug, and good wishes. No false promises, just any support I can give.

[justbeth]

thanks for being so supportive. i needed that. i just dont understand this, or what i did to make it happen. i hate feeling this way. so helpless and out of control. i want to fix it. but i know i cant and there is an extreamly HIGH probability that it will not get better. im trying to come to terms with that, but its not going well. i cant even get away from it in my sleep. i have nighmares that handfulls of hair come out.

[VictoriaG]

Acceptance is not so easy for many of us. I am truly happy for those who handle this better than I/we do. I hope you are having a better day today. Take care.

[justbeth]

im so ready to be at the acceptance stage. i dont know if that will ever come. it just seems like its so much energy to be okay with it and i just dont have that energy right now. im so tired of worrying and stressing over this and not getting answers from the doc.

i think i just may need a vacation! just a few days on the beach with a good book. that will probably work wonders! =)

thanks for your support victoria and your sweet words. :>

[VictoriaG]

Some days are so much harder than others, I understand that.

I love to read, I find it a peaceful distraction. So please, save me a lounge chair. And have a good weekend.

[AGWilson]

Just wanted to tell you that you're not alone. I am having the same feelings... exactly the same. My husband comes home from an overseas trip tonight and I'm embarrassed for him to see how much I've lost. He's only been gone a week. He has been sweet and supportive, but I think tonight will be the first night that he will really be able to see the difference in my hair volume. I've finally reached that point. I don't know what I dread more - him seeing me or the tears that I know I can't hold back. I am so, so depressed. Nothing seems to take my mind off of my hair. I asked my dr. for an anti-depressant, but he only gave me xanax. I'm afraid to take it - I have 3 kids to take care of and they don't need a zombie for a mom. Although, maybe I'm a zombie anyway since my mind is so pre-occupied.

Thanks for listening...

[justbeth]

Its okay to let him see it. if he has been as sweet and supportive as you say, im sure he is going to be just that when he comes home. and girl, cry on his shoulder, i know you probably need it. dont hold back and try to be strong, he is there to support you and help you through this, let him do that for you. and im sure you will feel so much better when you do. i have had to use my bf shoulder to cry on a number of times with this hair loss deal. and it makes me feel better afterwards and he really helps me through it. i have a feeling your husband will do the same.

ive been getting depressed too, im right there with you. i will tell you though, meds are good when you need them (anti-depressants), but i wouldnt stay on them longer than needed. they are just not good for you. i went through a period of severe panic disorder. it was scarey how bad it was. i got on zoloft and xanax. i was on both for about 2.5yrs. i finally got off the zoloft and now i only have to use the xanax on occassion. but if you feel you really need it, then go back to the doc and talk to them more about it.

thats good that your doc just gave you xanax for now. it works wonders i will tell you. it makes you feel okay with everything. i take .50mg and it really helps when i need it. especially before bed. you might want to take it in the evening the first few times you take it just to see how it makes you feel. i dont take mine too often and it does make me sleepy. and remember, you can always break the pills in half too.

i hope you get the relief and support you need tonight. i will be thinking of you.

:)

[AGWilson]

Hi justbeth,

Thank you so much for your sweet and thoughtful reply. I'm sorry for not responding sooner... I did read it and am feeling slightly better, emotionally speaking. It appears that I have some other health issues that may or may not be related to my hair loss - I am back to the doctor next week to hopefully get some answers.

Thanks again for being there!

[justbeth]

I hope all is going well. I have been out of the loop here for a while. Work has been consuming me! How are things going with you?