I can't stop crying

Discussion in 'You've Got My Support' started by dorky, Oct 28, 2013.

  1. dorky

    dorky New Member

    Hi all,

    First of all, I have been reading post here on the forum and it really helps me to calm down. I am 24 years old and over a year ago I suddenly started to lose a lot of hair, up to 400-500 strands a day. My hairloss comes with severe scalp pains that wake me up at night and I am really starting to feel depressed. My hair(loss) has become an obsession and I have a lot of trouble concentrating at work/ university. I just feel like I am waiting for the day that I go bald. Sometimes the scalp pain is so bad that I somehow feel like shaving my head..

    I honestly don't know what to do and I have never felt this way in my life. All I do is cry and feel sorry for myself. I have always been insecure and the only thing I used to like about myself was my hair, but now that my hair is leaving me like this..

    Can anyone advice me on how to put myself back together again?
  2. Ray

    Ray New Member

    Hi Dorky,

    I definitely understand your pain. I have been experiencing the effects of hair loss since I was 18. It has been a long and painful 14 year struggle for me. Please see my post, entitled "My Confession". It outlines the progression of my struggles, but it also reveals the more positive feelings I am beginning to develop. I'm starting to build my confidence, love, and acceptance of myself again, even though my hair loss continues endlessly. Also, take a look at as many posts you can while you are browsing. I am finding lots of information about potential causes for my loss, and I'm sure you will, too.

    I wish I could make it all go away for you, and for all of us! Here's to wishing you get better XOXO


    PS I shaved my head when I was 26 so that I could stop worrying about stupid hair for at least a little while. It was actually kind of fun and liberating, but not a good long-term solution for me personally.
  3. tori11

    tori11 New Member


    As someone also with low self esteem and pretty horrific hair loss I know how you feel. I also understand how it can be so hard to let go of these worries because your hair can be something quite central in your appearance

    Sometimes to help my self esteem rather than thinking of my hair, I think of other things I do like about myself. If you struggle to do that appearance wise, ask your nearest and dearest and I bet they can point out some of your lovely features.

    Appearance aside, think of some of the reasons that you are a good person or good qualities that you have. As a society we get so hung up on appearance and it's easy to be drawn into, but remember our body is just a shell and it's what's inside that makes you who you are. Sometimes even acting confident can do wonders.

    All else fails, remember there is a whole community of people out there going through similar difficulties and you are not alone!

    What has your doctor said about your hair loss/scalp pain? Do you know the cause? If so sometimes it can help to write a plan and goals so you feel proactive in your own recovery

    I really hope things start to improve soon!


  4. dorky

    dorky New Member

    Dear Ray and Tori,
    Thanks a lot for your messages!
    @ Ray; I will read your post after writing this message.I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing an ongoing struggle for 14 years now! :( Honestly, it makes me wonder if it is ever going to stop for me...
    I am happy that you are finding some positive feelings in your life. My hairloss struggle appeared out of nothing a year and 3 months ago. In a short amount of time I lost a lot of hair, but only 6 months ago my scalp started to hurt, only for the last 4 weeks it has been unbearable... I wake up at night crying, it are several flares everyday in which my scalp starts to burn, I start feeling feverish/chilly and it looks like I am blushing (my cheeks turn red and bumpy). However, my scalp does not show any signs of inflammation other than some redness and some small bumps sometimes. AND: here's to you, getting better *hug*. It means a lot to me that you took the time to reply to my post.
    @ Tori, thanks a lot for you reply. I am thinking about at least cutting my hair very short. The thing is, even though it falls out at a shockingly fast rate, it still grows at a crazy speed... The only thing is that I worry that this will be the last head of long hair I'll ever have so I am scared of cutting it short. Thanks for your advice. I find it very hard to think about things I like about myself atm. That's why I am really happy to have found these boards, cause I was starting to feel all alone and desperate. How are you feeling now?

    My doctor has given me topical cremes against inflammation. He told me that if I wasn't this young (24) he'd suspect me of athritis. However, that doesn't have to do anything with hairloss does it?! I have low iron and I am getting supplements for it, but that doesn't cause the pain I experience. I mean, this pain is real, and it honestly is quite bad. I broke my femur some years ago, and I'd rather feel that pain at the moment tbh.

    At the hospital they tested my blood, they did a test for cushing disease ( however I don't have most of the symptoms), a photo of my lungs, a scan of my torso etc. However, if anything significant had come out of that I'd have heard it by know I guess...?I have to go there on monday.

    A long story again.. I am sorry. But i just needed to write it off..

    Good luck and a lot of strength to both of you. and thanks again! :>

    xx dorky
  5. Ray

    Ray New Member

    You poor thing! To have to deal with hair loss and this pain! I am so sorry! Have you been tested for lupus? Also, have you been to see a dermatologist yet?

    I really hope that you find the source of your pain and hair loss very very soon, and that it can be easily managed. Wishing the best for you!!
  6. dorky

    dorky New Member

    Thank you!

    Thank you for replying Ray,

    I do not think I was tested for Lupus. The internist at the hospital ordered some bloodwork including ANA and ANCA, does that have anything to do with it? He's on holiday now, but I think if they would have found anything they'd have let me know right? :( It's not that I want it to be something like that... I just need to know what I am dealing with so I can try to get rid of this pain!
    I saw a dermatologist almost a year ago and he could not tell what was going on with my hair.

    Is it normal for hairloss (maybe aga) to come with this amount of pain? I think the pain is way worse than the loss itself :S
  7. downfordaisy

    downfordaisy Member

    Please have your natural hormones checked! And ferritin and vit D. I am 23 lost a ton of my hair and found I was very low ferritin, vit D, and progesterone. I have had all these tests done by normal do and everything was "normal". A holistic natural hormone replacement dr found all this to be wrong with me and now I a, trying to correct all this and save my hair. Do your research about hair loss and low progesterone you will find SO much info. Your symptoms sound hormone related. Good luck! It has been 3 years for me and I'm still trying to correct this. If you have taken any birth control or plan B those can mess your hormones drastically.
  8. downfordaisy

    downfordaisy Member

    Oh! I also have scalp pain that has woken me up at night.
  9. Jiffer

    Jiffer New Member

    Hi dorky (feels weird to write that)

    ANA stands for anti nuclear antibody and is the test for Lupus, combined with other symptoms. I wonder if your doctor meant he suspected rheumatoid arthritis, which as you may know is an autoimmune disease very different from osteo-arthritis that many people get with age. Definitely follow up with your doctor, but as you said I am sure he will call you if there is a problem. Best wishes and hang in there!!!