I have been on this forum for only a month. I have tried to be encouraging, sympathetic, understanding. Have tried to by upbeat and hopeful but I feel that I am not being heard or understood. That it. Im done. Done with the tears. Tired of those who don't understand my pain. Even my husband doesn't get it. As one on here stated: How can a woman feel understood when even the bible defines a woman by her hair? The pills and vodka are sitting here next to me. At exactly 9 oclock im going to end it. Go ahead. Dont believe me. Dare me to take my life. I can asure you that Im already ahead of you. This is my final post. I wanted to post this in order for others to understand the pain this has caused me. Im sure that I won't get any feedback for this. Im tired of the selfishness of humanity.